


Falling, Falling

by Memos



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-28
Updated: 2014-09-28
Packaged: 2018-02-19 04:40:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2374910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Memos/pseuds/Memos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I thought you were dead," Erwin tells him once again.</p>
<p>"I'm not," Levi answers back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Falling, Falling

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a post I made earlier about this idea of Erwin and Levi using the 3DMG to sneak into each other's windows like stupid teens in an attempt to keep their relationship a secret. This is all very dumb and silly, and i'm sorry that it starts off angsty and emotional and just descends into fluffy comedy.

It happens a little over two years after that day in the rain, where he'd felt that sharpened blade against his neck and knew with grim certainty that the man above him had every intention of letting it slip across his throat, and if that's not the most ironic thing in the world Erwin doesn't know what is. They'd been fresh off an excursion, the first out of Trost and since the fall of Wall Maria. Erwin can barely see straight the anger bubbles in his veins so hot and fast, and he doesn't even stop a moment to ask why or how. Storming past the remnants of his branch (there's far more of them left this time, which should elevate his black mood into something close to euphoria with all they've been through) he doesn't bother to even remove his cloak or inspect the fine scratches and bruises that litter his face and hands. He closes himself up in his personal study, slamming the door shut and not refilling his lungs with a deep, soothing breath until he's seated comfortably behind his desk once more.

It had all happened so quickly, as things tended to do when you were outside the walls and in direct danger. Erwin had been heading the central line as he often did, when a signal flare had gone up to their left flank; thick, black smoke dissipated in the air, drawing muttered curses from those around him. It was too close for comfort, and the answering signal from the group that was just over the next hill was nowhere to be seen. He threw out a command to signal a shift in formation, all while blindly turning his own mount and making for the direction in which the next group should be. If they'd not seen the smoke, there were precious seconds left before they could run into a deviant. With only himself, Mike, and a couple other soldiers they made in that direction, Erwin's heart hammering a violent tune against his rib cage.

"Erwin, the left is where Levi was stationed," Mike calls out over the crash of hoof beats. Erwin only sets his lips into a thin line, already knowing exactly where the younger man should be. 

They arrive to find an already smoking titan carcass, a huge fifteen meter class with long, awkward limbs that stick out irregularly in a death sprawl. Erwin races the length of it, looking for survivors, spying the splintered wood of one of their carts just under it, the high whine of dying horses filling the air. He knows that he runs the risk of pushing his mount too far by the way they gallop through long, guttered out trenches of earth that the titan made during it's fall, but he can't seem to find it in himself to take a second to pause, blue eyes scanning the pile of debris and gore ruthlessly. Half a dozen times he resists the urge to call out, afraid of what his voice will sound like when he does. 

He comes around the head of the thing, prepared to dive down the other side when he finds him, sitting against the ruined edge of another cart, leg propped up as if he's enjoying a moment of peace instead of watching his own horse die in the mud. Erwin feels a wild cacophony of surprise, relief, and blind rage swell all in a matter of seconds. Levi gazes back at him as if he's distinctly bored with the whole affair.

"Nice to see you, I'd thought I was stranded," he calls out, not sounding the least bit worried, and it only serves to ratchet up Erwin's anger a couple notches. 

"Are you hurt?" he calls back, making to dismount in case Levi needs assistance. The black -haired man springs up from his makeshift seat, limping over to his horse but not badly enough that he requires help.

"Landed a bit awkwardly, I think my ribs might be bruised," he volunteers as if discussing the weather, "But i'm better off than he is," he responds with a subtle toss of his head in the direction of the fallen titan. Erwin can feel the muscles in his jaw clench, but only delivers a stiff nod, waiting as the other man tosses a leg up to climb on the back of his horse. The Commander wastes no time turning back to where Mike and the others are waiting, rejoining the line and their swift retreat back towards the safety of the walls. 

"You didn't send up a signal flare," Erwin finally grounds out, the solid weight of his Captain seated behind him both a reassurance and an annoyance. 

"Didn't have time," Levi answers, in a bored tone that suggests he's already tired of talking about it, "By the time we saw the smoke it was already on us. I told Haus to forget it but he insisted on fumbling around with the damn thing. He was the first to get hit." 

Erwin wishes he could be sympathetic, but right now all he wants to to get back and maybe kick over the chair in his office a little. If Levi notices his dark mood, he doesn't say anything, content to practically lean against the taller blond in his saddle as the sun slips lower and turns the sky a bloody red mess. 

Three hours later and now seated in said chair Erwin still can't let go; he's seen countless deaths, led men to them even, but the fear and the apprehension and the rage that had poured through him in that instant had been consuming. He had fully expected to turn the corner and find Levi sprawled in the grass, grey eyes lifeless and empty. What, then? Had he been mad to find him alive and whole? Shouldn't he be happy now?

His musing ends when the person in question appears at his door, not bothering to knock and strolling in with a sense of familiarity that no other solider would dare possess in a Commander's presence. Erwin tries with all his might to not even glance up, pretending to be bothered with his paperwork and note taking. Levi doesn't say anything for several seconds, content to watch Erwin's little act before finally speaking up. 

"What the hell's gotten into you?" 

Erwin pauses, still not looking at him. His first instinct is to ask him to leave without answering. The second, is to brush it off, plaster on a placating smile and tell him he's just tired, and that makes him even more angry. He settles on the third option.

"I thought you were dead today and you don't seem to give a shit. Excuse me if i'm terse." 

Silence weighs heavy in the room, and Erwin's so tempted to look up and see Levi's reaction but his anger holds his gaze back on the paper. It's a rarity for Erwin to curse so openly, something that Levi's taken a great amount of amusement in, but there's nothing funny about this now. 

"Excuse me?" 

"Please, Levi, I don't want to..."

Levi rounds the desk and physically wrenches the papers from Erwin's hands, sending them sprawling in all directions like confetti. Finally, Erwin looks up and into a blaze of molten silver-grey. 

"You don't think I care? You don't think I care that I lost four good men...that I lost men, supplies, and _all_ of their horses today?" It's no secret that Survey is desperate for money and supplies, and Levi takes it as a personal failure that they'd returned with even less.

Erwin presses fingers to his own temples, anger quickly receding into regret for how he'd phrased it, "Of course not, Levi I only meant-"

_"Then what the fuck did you mean!?"_ He hisses down at his Commander, every bit the feral looking criminal Erwin remembers from their first encounter in the underground. And suddenly it's like the memory alone is a match stick over kerosene.

Erwin's on his feet a heartbeat later, physically backing Levi into a corner with his size and voice alone. He's certain that Levi's never seen him like this, if the size of his eyes and his blank expression is anything to go on.

"To hell with supplies and horses! I'm prepared for that!" he bellows, eyebrows creased with anger, "I don't _care_ about food and weapons and whatever else we've lost. I'm even prepared for the likelihood of losing soldiers, it's a certainty for us. But-"

Erwin stops himself. His own eyes round slightly, looking past Levi at some indistinguishable spot on the wall behind him. Levi still looks stunned, lips parting and closing before finally giving a voice to his own thoughts.

"But..." he tries, before stopping to wet his lips in nervous fascination, "But you're not. You're not prepared to lose..."

"Levi..." it's a whispered breath and it changes the very air between them. 

"Hey," Levi says simply, low and quiet as he takes Erwin's face in his hands, guiding his gaze back to him, even if Erwin's reluctant. He knows what this is now, what this anger means and this relief at staring at the man before him that grows by miles and miles with the way Levi's constant glare seems to unfurl. He repeats it again, a whispered _"hey",_ guiding him to press their foreheads together in this quiet space they've created. Erwin can't bare to look at him anymore and closes his eyes for a moment of peace. 

"I thought you were dead," Erwin tells him once again.

"I'm not," Levi answers back. 

The dam overflows and takes everything with it. Erwin's hands are hard and still half compelled by anger with the way they grasp Levi, pushing him further back into the wall and angling so that he can press his mouth to the other's. Levi surges up, not to fight him back but to take what he's given, his own hands clenching in the fabric of Erwin's jacket desperately as he meets him. The smaller man practically writhes against the wall, moaning not in pleasure but with relief as Erwin kisses him.

"Finally..." Levi gasps when they part, Erwin only taking a second to rotate them so that he can press his Captain down on to his desk, _"Finally..."_

***

They set the ground rules quickly after that; despite all things, it is still highly unprofessional for the Commander of the Survey Corps to be seen engaging in inappropriate behavior with a subordinate, even if there's nothing unequal about them in private. It's an interesting change in dynamic, but not as large as Erwin had imagined, which only serves to make him wonder on the nature of his and Levi's relationship before that point. They continue to play their roles, never letting slip for ever a second in front of others. It's only in Erwin's office after a day of training, or in the morning before breakfast, or behind the stables when no one is looking do they ever let themselves indulge in brief touches or an errand kiss. It's not exactly the most satisfying of arrangements, but it works for them. That is, until it doesn't anymore.

Erwin can't seem to force himself to go up to his own quarters, stuck on the landing before Levi's with his hands tangled in his hair and his lips firmly sealed to the others. Levi can't help but be amused by his Commander's desperation.

"What will people think if they see their beloved Commander busy with his tongue down his Captain's throat?" Levi asks when they come up for air like a couple of teens. Erwin wants to tell him he doesn't give two shits what they'll think, but he knows that that's a lie.

"I'll just tell them you required mouth to mouth resuscitation," Erwin smiles, unable to tear his hands away.

"Oh?" Levi asks with the tilt of his head, "I was unaware that that required the use of your hand on the victim's ass." 

Erwin seems mesmerized by the movement of the other's mouth, not even rising to his joke, "Come to my room," he requests, blue eyes on fire.

Levi looks tempted for the briefest of seconds, before giving a small shake of his head, "That's dumb, Erwin. You wanted to keep this from everyone, what will people think when I come strolling out of your room tomorrow morning?" 

"Sleepover party," he winks with a bit of a grin. 

Levi shoves at him, backing into his own room, "Goodnight, Commander," he teases before shutting the door. 

Erwin ambles up to his room, tired but frustrated as well, debating on if he should try to work it off with some light exercise or go right to bed. He shuffles into his darkened room, finding a candle to light the way and then almost drops it when he spies the figure in the window. 

"Or...we could put our gear to good use I suppose..." Levi calls from the window ledge, 3DMG strapped to his thighs. Erwin is shocked for a second before his libido kicks in again and he grinning against Levi's neck, helping him out of the leather straps and further into his room. 

***

If anyone is suspicious as to why the Commander and Captain take to keeping their 3DMG in their personal chambers, no one says anything about it. Erwin and Levi keep up their habit of sneaking into each other's rooms under the cover of dark, spending the night wrapped up in each other until dawn's first light. Erwin's a little hesitant at first, considering the damage that's probably being done to the building's facade by the hooks, but quickly forgets about it when he comes back from a late meeting to find Levi reclining on his bed, clad only in one of his white button-ups. 

This particular morning dawns bright, waking both men from their spot curled up together in Erwin's bed. It propels the both of them up for the day, sharing a sleepy kiss and a couple parting assurances of meeting over breakfast before Levi is suited up and leaping up onto the window ledge, exiting to his own room. It's a maneuver he's done a dozen times before, swinging down to reach his own window but something goes wrong at the last moment; one of his hooks dislodges from the stone wall just as he shifts his weight, sending him spinning sideways into the other wire. His limbs tangle up easily, and with the shift in momentum he impacts directly with a nearby window, so hard it rattles the window pane. Cursing, Levi tries to untangle himself, still hanging precariously from his remaining hook. If only Erwin were still in his room...

The sound of the window opening behind him drew Levi's attention away from the problem at hand, black hair flopping into his eyes as he craned his neck around to look at his savior.

"Well hello there!" Hange cried, folding her arms on the windowsill to stare at Levi in obvious amusement. 

_"Fuck,"_ Levi muttered, wishing his wire would break and allow him to plummet to his merciful death. Hange seemed to find that funny.

"Well this is interesting...new maneuver practice perhaps?" she asked, sticking her head out a bit further to get a look at where his hook was lodged. Levi hung uselessly in the air.

"You could...say that, I guess..." he grunted back, clenching his teeth, "Hange, c'mon, get me the hell out of here..."

Hange apparently wasn't intent on listening to his plight, "This is strange, you don't start training until after breakfast usually..." she squinted at his anchor point again, looking up and all around before looking back at Levi, "Did you dismount from Erwin's window?" 

Levi groaned, running a hand across his face. Of all the people. Of all the people in this damn branch he had to smack right into Hange's window...the one person smart enough to figure it out. 

"Levi...Levi, are you blushing?" her grin stretched from ear to ear.

Levi remained unmoving, hanging in midair like some kind of grumpy, over-sized bat, "Get me down and i'll see to it that Erwin increases your research budget by 20%" he ground out between clenched teeth. Hange gave an overly dramatic gasp.

_"You did come out of Erwin's window!"_ the woman shrieked, as Levi tried desperately to keep the noise down.

"Hange? What's going...?" Both soldiers looked up sharply to see Erwin leaning out his bedroom window, now clad in uniform. His expression shifted from mildly concerned to mortified as he spied his lover hanging upside down in front of Hange's window.

"OH! Oh god...Uhh..." Erwin tried to rein in his emotions, attempting to look composed, "I...what are you two doing at this hour...?" he tried weakly, Hange's grin only stretching further as Levi's hand impacted with his face.

"Nice try Commander," Hange called out loudly, "When's the wedding!?" 

"You shut your hole _right now,_ shitty glasses..." 

"Hange, please, we're in a very compromising situation here..."

Hange hummed thoughtfully, considering their pleas, "I seem to remember Levi suggesting you raise my funds...saaay...by 20%?" 

Erwin shot Levi a withering look, who responded with a small shrug. 

_"Really?_ Really, Levi? 20%?" 

"Look, do you want this madwoman to get my ass out of here or not?"

"Said madwoman would appreciate _an answer_ unless you want the new cadets finding you in this predicament after breakfast..."

"FINE!"

"Alrighty then, give me a moment..." Hange had begun to withdraw back inside her window to retrieve something when the sound of another window opening drew everyone's attention further down. 

"Something going on out here?" Mike called, hair still damp from his shower. 

_"Oh my god..."_ Levi groaned, covering his face with both hands. Hange was back in a flash.

"HI MIKE!" she called happily down to him, waving excitedly. Even Erwin gave a weak wave to the man, who was looking back and forth at the three in apparently curiosity. 

"What's Levi doing?" he asked, as if it were an entirely ordinary occurrence to find a fellow soldier hanging upside down outside of the HQ in the early morning hours.

"Botched suicide attempt," Levi growled, swinging precariously, "Hange, I swear to the three walls, get me down right now or so help me..."

"Hey Mike! Didja know about Erwin and Levi!?" Hange called down, loud enough that there were several more sounds of windows opening further along the building side.

"Hange, please, the blood is rushing to his head, he's bound to pass out soon..." Erwin shouted in a hurry, trying to drawn Mike's attention away. 

"Yes," Mike nodded, drawing surprised looks from all three, "What? Did you really think I wouldn't be able to smell you on each other? After what you two get up to?"

"Oh my god..." Erwin groaned, burying his rapidly reddening face in his hands. 

"That's disgusting. You're disgusting," Levi spat. 

"So wait," came another voice, Erd pushing his head out to get a look at the other soldiers, "That kind of thing's allowed now? Fraternization?" 

Hange shrugged above him, "I don't think there's any rules against it?" 

Erd nodded firmly, "Someone needs to tell Bossard," he spoke with solid determination. 

"Oh my god, I don't even want to know," Levi shouted, covering his ears.

"SOME PEOPLE ARE STILL TRYING TO SLEEP!" Gunther bellowed, joining the fray, "Oh, sorry Commander..." he sheepishly corrected, noticing Erwin, who gave a wave to let him know it was ok. 

"What's going on out here?" Petra called, popping out right next to Erd, "Captain, are you ok?" 

"No Petra, I am not," he responded through his teeth, "My personal life is being dragged out in front of most of the Corps, my pride is wounded, and I can no longer feel my legs." 

"Heh, was that before or _after_ you left Erwin's?" Mike suggested.

"MIKE!" Erwin shouted in a scandalized tone. 

Levi could just make out Nifa, Luke, Dita, and Keiji popping up in their respective windows. Fucking hell, why wouldn't death just come and end this?

"What's going on?"

"Did you hear what Mike said?!"

"Does this mean no one's making breakfast........ _guys_...?"

"CALLED IT!"

"S-squad leader!" yelled Moblit, who had just appeared as well, "Quick! He's trying to severe the wire!" 

"LEVI NO!" Hange screamed, practically falling out of her window to stop him.

"LET GO WOMAN, LET ME DIE WITH SOME DIGNITY!" the Captain screamed back, attempting to wrestle away from her. The commotion had reached such a pitch that Levi was sure that every member of the Survey Corps was awake and present by now, all shouting recommendations and questions at once. Just when he thought Erwin was about to have a heart attack attempting to yell over all of them, a short, loud whistle broke the noise, shocking everyone into silence. 

All looked down at Petra Ral, who still had her fingers held aloft in front of her mouth. 

"Ok listen up everyone! Commander Smith, Captain Levi: No one cares about your personal lives and if you're happy, then i'm sure we'll all be happy as well! Squadleader Hange," she rounded to the woman sternly, "you shouldn't be attempting to extort the Commander under these circumstances."

Hange had the decency to look slightly ashamed. 

"And YOU!" she shouted, pointing down at Keiji, who's eyes widened in shock, "YOU are supposed to be on breakfast duty this morning! WHY DO I NOT SMELL BACON YET!?"

Keiji gave the small woman one last terrified look before slamming his window shut and fleeing.

No one dared to speak a word, all still in stunned silence. Levi could feel the smallest tendril of pride snake through his chest at his squad member's candor. Erd finally broke the silence.

"Petra, isn't that Auruo's room?"

"I-" Petra never got a chance to explain, two hands reaching out of the darkness behind her to pull her back and slam the window shut, cutting off her explanation.

"Oh, good," Erd said pleasantly, "I don't have to tell him about the fraternization thing now."

Levi blinked, turning back to Hange, "Please, get me the fuck down."

"Do I still get my budget increased?"

"NO!!!" came the chorus of shouts, from all directions this time.


End file.
